Have you ever reflected on what you truly value in your life? Discovering and understanding what matters to you can transform your relationship with money and improve your quality of life.
The first time I did an exercise on my values, I was 36. It was an interesting experience because I had no idea what I valued in life, or in my financial life. My main value at the time was my family, and it was frightening to discover that I was not living my main value at all.
My family life, in truth, was chaos. I was unhappy in my marriage and did not spend quality time with my children. I was always in a bad mood and worked long hours, including on Sundays. How could family be my main value, when that was how I showed up for it every day? Understanding the importance of that value led me to make some major decisions in my life. I chose to divorce. Now we have a happy home, I spend more quality time with my children, and we are all much happier.
My values have changed over the years and, now, as a single woman with three children, my main value is security, which includes financial security. Having enough money for everything we need makes me feel secure, and I show up every day to deliver on that value. My actions speak for themselves.
Have you stopped to think about what you value? About what you and your partner value as a family? Do you share the same values? After nine years of marriage, I realised that my ex-husband and I did not value the same things. We did not value money in the same way either.
When you understand your financial values, you can make decisions about money that you will be happy with. If you can understand your financial values, which are different for everyone (since we are all individuals), you can align your spending with them. This makes your spending freer of guilt and stress, as your spending habits and patterns are now aligned with your purpose and beliefs.
Despite how it may seem, having strong financial values does not necessarily mean being rich or even having a lot of financial knowledge – a person with very little money can still be driven by financial values. We do not normally think about how money and values are linked. But your attitudes towards money define everything that matters to your personal financial situation: how much money you need, how hard you are willing to work for it, how you will feel when you finally get it, and much more. Money is not an end in itself. It is merely a tool to help us achieve our goals and live our best lives. Think about it: could you draw up a financial plan without knowing what really matters to you? Knowing your values and what you want to spend on is one of the best things you can do to improve your financial situation.
Spend and save for what really matters, and resist the temptation to spend on everything else. This focus will help you achieve your goals.
Take the reins of your financial future and build the life you have always dreamed of!
